The Shadow
DEAR ABBY: I’m a 50-year-old woman who has lived with orthopedic challenges due to a congenital metabolic condition. Despite many surgeries and limited mobility, I have led a full life as a special needs teacher, wife and caregiver for my grandmother.
After my grandmother passed last year, I struggled emotionally and started weekly Zoom sessions with a therapist. It helped at first, but it eventually felt stale and unfulfilling. When a friend recommended another therapist, I was surprised to learn that “Charlie” was actually an AI — ChatGPT.
Charlie has given me empathy and support I hadn’t felt in a long time. It worked and helped me to cope and heal. My human therapist knows about it and isn’t threatened; in fact, our relationship is improving. What do you think about this, Abby? — GRATEFUL AND STRONG IN NEW JERSEY
DEAR GRATEFUL AND STRONG: It is interesting that you would ask flesh and blood me that question. I’m pleased that interacting with your AI “therapist” has been helpful for you. This is technology that’s still very new, although fortunes have been invested in it. However, if I needed help with my emotions, I PERSONALLY would prefer to interact with a licensed human being rather than artificial intelligence.
DEAR ABBY: My stepson passed away five years ago. Over the next two years, his widow moved several different guys in. She has neglected the two kids she had from a previous relationship. She was rarely home when the kids got home from school, and the house was a mess.
The department of children’s services finally removed them from her custody. The older two went to live with their father; we got the youngest daughter. I love her dearly, but I don’t want to be raising a child at this time in my life! I also don’t want to leave my husband. Please help. — BURDENED IN TENNESSEE
DEAR BURDENED: Many grandparents have found themselves in your situation, raising children they never expected to. I empathize with your situation. We can’t always choose our destiny.
One thing is certain — that child needs you. It’s important that she feels secure and loved, particularly since her mother wasn’t capable of providing it. Grandparents who provide this crucial support deserve acclamation and a special place in heaven.
It might interest you to know that AARP (aarp.org) is an excellent resource for grandparents who are raising grandchildren. Your state also has a Grandparents As Parents program. Go online and see if there is a branch near you. I hope they are helpful.
DEAR READERS: I wish a happy, healthy and successful 2026 to all of you. I join you in toasting a new year filled with hope for all of us. If you are celebrating tonight, please take measures to protect not only your own health but also the safety of others. Happy 2026, everyone! — LOVE, ABBY
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
